So, Guess Where We Just Got Back From.....

Yup. The Happiest Place on Earth. :-) My parents took me and the short one to Disney World last week. Yeah, happy late birthday Jacob/early birthday me/and Merry Christmas to us both!

It was a total blast. 

We crammed every bit of fun we could into every single moment. 

We hit 3 parks in one day (oh, yes we did.) and, on the day we left, we went to a park one last time.

Go Big, Before You Go Home!

I just *might* have a few opinions about our stay! Come back this week to hear them, if you're interested. We went to the freshly opened part of FantasyLand in the Magic Kingdom.

Ate at Chef Mickey.

Stayed at a "Value Resort"

Used the buses.

And the meal plan.

Yup, I have opinions, a plenty!

Storybook Parade

So, this post *might* be a little late.

But, right before Halloween, Jacob's preschool had their annual Storybook Parade.
It was Jacob's first time to be a part of it.... and. if from the way he grinned like a silly boy, I'm thinking that he loved every moment.

Jacob as "Jake the Pirate"

with his teacher and his class

strutting his stuff in the parade

waving and looking for Mommy

There he is!

Me and my Pirate Boy.

I feel so blessed that Jacob is able to go to preschool at a place where he knows the staff and the staff knows us and loves on us in amazing ways.  Jacob has gone to this school since he was 1 year old. (from MDO to playschool to preschool)..... and it's been a really wonderful place for him and for me.

What I Love Wednesday, Charlie Brown edition

I love watching Jacob watch the Halloween Charlie Brown for the 9999th time... Cause I get things like *this* on camera.

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What I Love Wednesday

Hey, I remembered!


1) That I found a Jacob approved costume just in-time for the Fall Festival tonight! Whoo-hoo! (And, he's wearing it for the Storybook Parade at his school next week & for tricks or treats on Halloween!) The boy wanted to be Mickey.... badly. But, alas- there was no Mickey costume to be found.

2) We're like 4 weeks into Ounce Upon a Time & every episode has been freaking awesome! Are you watching this? Seriously! Totally my favorite show. Not even kidding. I may even love it more than The Big Bang Theory.

3) Hey, The Big Bang Theory is back!

4) There's like less than 60 days until our Disney World vacation. Can. Not. Wait.

5) I'm writing again. Really. Is there anything that I need to say?

6) I went to the eye doctor today. Two words. New. Contacts. Hey, that may seem like a small thing, but if you've been out of fresh contacts for a while..... yeah. It's awesome.

7) The book, 'Side Jobs', by Jim Butcher. If you don't know who Jim Butcher is.... I'm sorry. You should. Get to a book store. Go to the sci-fi section, look for the book, 'Storm Front'.... Start there. You're welcome.

8) I went to The State Fair of Texas twice this year..... that's an awesomeness that cannot be truly expressed. I love the Fair. Totally. (I did not love that our beloved Big Tex was lost on this his 60th year with us. That was horrible.) A Fair post is coming people. It's coming. If you've never been to the Fair. You should. Really.

9) Fried S'mores.... please see #8

10) 2 Fletchers Original Corny Dogs.... again please see #8


What about you? What do you love this Wednesday?

Quiet

It's rarely, if ever ,truly quiet around me. There is almost always something on. And loud. And requiring my attention. For most of my life, that's how I liked it. I craved the noise to drown out the silence. To drown out the sounds of my own breath. The thud of my heart. I've spent a lifetime rarely content to just. Be.

As I've gotten older, I think I've come to reach out for the silent... to greedily grasp it in the hands & hold on to it as tightly as I can. To sit. With the chaos of life beat down to a whisper. To breath. And hear the breaths go in and out. Reminding me that I am HERE. That for this moment in time, I can simply exist in this space and time.

And it reminds me of how much I rush over, skip over & flat out ignore when the noise gets too loud...

Like when I don't open my Bible for a week.
....~and yet, somehow, expect to be able to tune into Christ nonetheless

Like when I don't stop & talk to God.
....~ but somehow expect that things will go the right way anyway.

Like when I don't both to cease my striving & LISTEN to God.
....~ but yet, amazingly, believe that I can know His Heart & His Will.

I like the silence.

Rambling.........

So, I had great plans to commit to Lisa-Jo's Blog month thingy... and, well. You see.... not so much.

Oops.

I'm trying to work through my own story, I suppose. Work out just how much is wise to through out into the wide world of the New Fangled Information Super Hwy....

I have a love/hate relationship with the Blog world. At times, I LONG to be able to just vomit my thoughts and feelings out there and just let it out- for the whole world to see. But. Some of the people whom I (might) went about read this blog. There are thoughts that I could care less if total strangers are privy to..... but some family and friends??? No.

But, even more than that.... I do want to be wise with my written word. (I think past evidence can back me up that I'm not always super great with the being wise with the spoken word.... and oh, how I know the damage THAT can inflict.) And, once the words are sent through the computer. It's there. Forever. Words that will never be deleted or scrubbed away. .....

And. That makes me pause.

And to think about my posts. (sometimes too much)

I mentioned in another post that there have been some thoughts swirling around in my brain. They are coming. And... they are just that. Thoughts of mine. I'm not saying they are right or wrong. Up or down. Black or white. But, long sessions dwelling on the church in America, adoption, American culture at large, American culture in the church.... blessing, trials. A strange little mishmash.

We shall see where they take me.

We Went to Granbury

And of course, came back. :-)

Just a real quick, over night trip to take some pictures of the 4 year old..... (these aren't 'the' pictures)

Funny story? I forgot Jacob's pants at home. Ugh. For all my planning and packing OCD'ishness... Yeah. Left the child's jeans at home. Insert panic attack and freak out Here.

Sigh.

Thankfully there was a pair of pants in his grandmother's car that she had bought of him but Was going to take back to the store.... Guess what pants are now in the pictures?

Anyway. Happy weekend! Here in north Texas we are getting a burst of Glorious Fall weather & I'm enjoying like crazy. Hope the weather around you, dear Reader, rocks!



Oh, how he loved the hotel bed.


He had the best time. It was just like a grand adventure to him.





Me and my BabyLove. :-)






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5 Minute Friday. Wide.

Yup. So. It's 5 Minute Friday..... The Prompt is "Wide".... Here We Go....


I think I'm so often frozen by the gulf that is 'I'm so far from where I thought I would be by now'. I'm no where even close. I'm divorced. I have a kid. No job. I live with my parents & my grandmother. And I never thought that would be me.

But. I wonder what's keeping me from writing the words I want to write. Following the dreams that are bubbling up within me. That gulf of fear. Oh, she's wide. Wondering what others will think. I freeze at the thought of the disaproval of some people. (I wish I could be less of that person.)

I know that God has me. I know.

And I have been blessed beyond my thoughts- my son. Is Amazing. And. I have a relationship with a really wonderful man. (I could write for an hour or 2 about those 2.) And a family that does love me.

Perhaps the next step is to just take it. Go for it. Maybe I should just jump.

We'll see.

What I Love Wednesday

So, I kinda dropped the ball on this one. Whoops. And, I will say, in my defense... it's been that kinda week/summer. Lot's of stuff going on in my world. Lot's of stuff going on in my heart. Still trying to sort it all out into some kind of cogent pattern I hope I can share with yall. I've seen God's finger prints time and again over the stained glass of my heart & life.... and this season is no different. It's simply... different.

Anyway.

Here's a short, What I Love Wednesday. Enjoy. And remember to look around and truly see the things in your life that you truly love- be they big or small.

1) Late Night Dance Parties. (aka: watching my boy find his groove & his soul)

2) A "Peet-stop" (if you've seen Cars. You know you what I'm talking about)

3) When my son says he wants me to take a picture of him making a silly face. :-) Any time.

4) These 2.

5) 3 Generations of Steeler Nation. Oh, the Pride. That's my Daddy, Jacob & me.

6) There are still a few more years when my son still likes and wants to take pictures with his mommy. And hanging with his mommy is one of his favorite things to do in this world.

Happy Wednesday! 


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So, I Made Lunch One Day

Every once in a great while, I like to exercise my cooking skills around lunch time. Usually around the same time I'm thinking about trying out a new recipe & I'm having doubts or questions about it. What better time, than lunch time? When it's usually just me & the wingman around to flex the culinary muscles?

I thought so.

Behold, today ... I give you a lunch time recipe. In pictures.

This first step is Important. Go to the store. Get a 6-pack of Zevia Natural Sodas. Go! Go, now! They are super yummy. And, no. I haven't been asked to say that. I just really love them. This pretty pink can is filled with tasty Strawberry (!).

Anyway. On with the show- or lunch. Whatever.

I had a recipe that I found. Somewhere. I had most of the ingredients. (yeah, whoops. always check your recipe Before you start cooking, kids!) But I had a few ideas to tweak it, so to speak.

Chop some onion. I used what I had leftover in the FridgAdair. That would be 3/4 of a white onion & about 1/4 of a purple.

Heat up a nice, large skillet with some olive oil. (net time, though, I'm thinking of chopping up some Bacon & then adding the onion once the bacon cooks up. Everything is better with bacon.) Add some garlic. How much? Hmmm.... I used one of my regular old spoons I set the table with with- one scoop. (I'm so precise.)

While the onions & garlic are cooking (and the garlic is hopefully not burning!) chop up one zucchini. Really. I just used one. I thought I might need more than that. Nope. Just one.

Throw it in the pan. And if a short one who's seen "Ratatouille" one too many times comes wandering into the kitchen begging to be a cooker like Remy & "Please, Mommy! I want to help!" I say, hold the pan and left him stir.... and, you know. Take a picture.

Keep stirring.
Let the zucchini get nice and browned and tender and yummy.

Throw in some frozen corn. (Because the 4 year old will usually eat anything with corn.)

Drain a can of beans and dump the beans in. I used red kidney beans, but I think just about any kind of bean would work. Pick one you like.

Next, open a can of diced tomatoes and pour the whole can in. Stir, please.

Add some water and bring to a simmer. Now. Add some spices. I went with some basil, oregano, bay, thyme... you know, my spice palate love language. But I say, play around. Here's where this dish can be spun around to taste Mexican-y. Or whatever you're feeling like. The point is, just add whatever you want to flavor the dish. Here.

Then let it cook for about 10 minutes or so.

Add a cup of rice. Turn the heat down and let the rice soak up all the liquid. It will. I promise.

When it's done, it looks like this. Check your seasoning. (I added just a pinch of salt and pepper after it was all said and done.)

Oh, and then it looks like this on you're plate. Because you added some cheese. :-)

I liked this one. And even the Oh-so-too-picky-for-his-own-good little Mister liked it too.


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The First Day of Pre-School

Yesterday was the short one's first (real) day of pre-school. Sigh. My baby is a 4 year old. A child. He has his own sassy opinions. He can dress himself. Brush his teeth. Walk to and from the car & everywhere else (except when he decides that his legs or feet are broken & he cannot possibly walk another step, because 'Oh, the humanity! It's just too hard! Someone pick me up and carry me!')

So, yes. He started real-live, honest to goodness pre-school yesterday.

And yes, I made him stand in front of the front door with the '1st day of pre-school' sign. Oh, yes I did.

But, all he was really concerned about was his new 'pack-pack.' He's been asking me every. single. day. If today was the day that he would be allowed to wear it. He was thrilled when I told him yesterday morning that It Was the Day.

Who is this little kid? And where did my little baby boy go???

And, of course. A picture with his new teacher, Mrs. R.

I asked her how he did when I picked him up after school.
"Umm, well. He had some problems following directions." (poor lady. I think she thought I was going to get mad at her for saying that.)

(I laughed... to myself. Not out loud. That might be rude.) "Yeah, I kinda thought so. Just keep on him."

I feel a little badly for his teacher. She seems sweet and very lovely. And, I have a feeling that my little ray of sunshine is going to drive her crazy. Hopefully, she'll get his number quickly. (crosses fingers)
**
He's an interesting little guy, my off-spring. He's funny and outgoing as all get out. He's sweet as sugar. But. He's also strong willed as all get out. And stubborn as a mule. And on a mission in life (thus far) to rule. And, if he even so much as *thinks* that he can gain control. You're toast. Oh, and that independent streak that's about a mile wide? That will serve him quite well one day. But today? It's all about taming & civilizing the little whirling ball of boy.

I love that kid.
And, I'm crazy proud of him. And to be the one person in this world he calls, "Mommy."

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He Joins Me

It's 5 Minute Friday. (go Here to get all the intel on just what 5 Minute Friday is all about. And, while you're at it, I highly recommend reading Lisa-Jo's (I call her by her first name, as if I know her personally. Ah, the internet!) blog and then read some of the other blogs that will be linked up.)

This Friday's Prompt: Join

Go

Off and on all through my son's sweet little life, he's been joining me in my bed to sleep at night. Sometimes when he's sick. Sometimes when he's ha a bad dream. Most often, when he's simply gotten up in the middle of the night for no good reason and is wandering the house.

But lately, oh, since he turned the ripe old age of 4- it's changed. He joins me in my bed almost every night he's with me. I don't quite know what's changed or what truly started this new little bedtime ritual of his. But 9 times out of 10 if you're looking for Jacob at bedtime, you'll find him nicely tucked into "his" spot in my bed.

Sometimes we watch the Rangers game. Some times we watch Star Wars.

But, every night. He looks up at me with those bright blue eyes and says, "I like you Mommy." "I like you too, Jacob."

There will be a pause. And usually he'll hug me.
"I love you, Mommy."
"I love you, too"

And I don't mind so much the jumping and kicking and rolling around. And feeling like I'm sleeping with a wildabeast.

Because he's just 4 for now. And he won't want to join me in bed one day (nor should he!). He won't want to join me for much in days that are coming far, far to quickly.

But, for now. He does.
Stop

What I've Loved Wednesday

So, I've decided to start a new trend around these parts.....

::drumroll please::

What I've Loved Wednesday

..... in which I list out 5 things every (you guessed it!) Wednesday that I've loved. It might be something I've seen around the internet. It might be something I've read or something I'm reading. It might be a story that from my life. Or a picture. There are no rules..... except for the whole, 5 part.

So, without further waiting.........

1) This video.
Call Me Maybe- Steelers Training Camp 2012
I love the Steelers. And, I don't care if I'm 31.... I'm not quite done with Call Me Maybe this summer....

2) Jacob finished his first round of swimming lessons this past Tuesday. He went from not being able to swim AT ALL... to being able to swim like a little fish. I'm really loving that.


And... He got a ribbon. We both really loved that!

3) I managed to get my eyebrows waxed & a manicure this past week. Hey, it's the little things! (my nails are all the same shape & a lovely color of pink= happy me)

4) I think.... think.... maybe... just maybe. I've decided on a new preschool for Jacob. Don't quote me on that. But maybe.

5) Arnold Palmers..... the drink. Not the golfer. Not to say that the gentleman isn't a lovely man, I've never met him! I just really, really love the tasty, tasty, magical combination of ice tea & lemonade! It has been my summertime go-to drink. (and I really love that I can go thru pretty much any fast food joint and they will make it for me!)
Happy Wednesday Y'all!

In Which I Talk About Compassion

So.

I have been going back and forth with myself about writing about Compassion Intl.

I think it might go without saying that I support them. I have a Compassion child. I have links to them here on the blog. I tweet out links and posts on the Twitter. 

But.

But.

I haven't really talked about it.

About the little girl in Ecuador that I'm growing a relationship with through prayer and support. About how it is so worth 'sacrificing' the extra fast food run and Starbucks drive thru... to make sure that I have the support money to send to Compassion for L. And I hate how snarky it could sound putting the word sacrifices in "". But really. when I think about it. I have food at home. I have plenty of my beloved coffee at home. I have a closet FULL of clothes and shoes.

L ... not so much.

Her parents'... not so much. They worry every day about keeping their daughter (and their other children) Alive.

I don't really have that worry with Jacob. I know that I have the means and ability to provide my son's basic needs. Right now.

I can send that $38 a month. And write L letters. And send stickers and paper dolls. And... perhaps, even more importantly, get Jacob involved... get him to "write" letters and to draw her pictures. I can pray for her and her family (and community) every day. I have the power to invest in her life.

I don't have much. But I can do much with what I have. If I'm faithful with it.

Pasta night

Tonight was pasta night up here in this crib. And, while I hate to toot my own horn too much... I will in this one case! I make really, really good pasta.

But don't take word on it....


'see my pasta? It's so delicious!'


The pictures don't even cover half the glee and unrestrained passion this boy exhibits for his pasta.


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Epic of Fail

Have you ever failed so specifically & so spectacularly that you actually hear what the other person thinks of you? Have you every failed so much that you can hear God telling you how ashamed He is of you?
That as the words come out of your mouth... that you sooo intended to hurt. Oh, yes you did. And, as they found their mark- they were returned.

And. You wanted to vomit.

Because you started to see how very stupid you are. And how much hurt you Are causing?

And... you still want to vomit.

And. You are so ashamed that you resorted to anger & the very most awful words you could possibly fling at the other person.... just because. Just because you couldn't summon your own thoughts & you felt threatened. and. You couldn't be adult enough to say, "You, know .... I need to get my words together. Give me some time."

Dear God.

Yeah.

That would be me and my last hour.

Confession? I suck. I really do.
And ... I really hate myself for the damage that I've caused.

So Far.... its been the Champ

So. The youngling received a with InnoTab for his 4th birthday this year. Complete with a Cars2 game to go with it. (thank you, Aunt Charlotte & Uncle Butch)

He calls it his "iPAD".... possibly he's spent some time around other people's iPAD's before. :-)




I have to admit. It's pretty cool. (and that's a quote) Jacob LOVES playing on it & the Cars2 plug in game thingy. (Wow, aren't I hi-tech?) He's begging for the Mickey Mouse game & for me to see if there's a Peter Pan or Remy game. I'd say, he loves it.

The only problem is...... getting him OFF the game. :-)


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His birthday dinner

Well, we went to Buca di Beppo for Jacob's birthday dinner. He's my little pasta eater- so it was a no brainer. This child can eat triple his weight in pasta. Any pasta.
(though, I do admit he has a certain fondness for spaghetti and meatballs at Buca and *my* own red sauce and rigatoni)

And, we always have good food & a good time at Buca di Beppo. 

I do think that it was a hit.
We branched out a wee bit from the traditional 'red sauced' pastas.
Chicken Carbonara
and
Penne San Remo
....
Yum.

Above: On the top, Jacob giving his approval.
Bottom left: The birthday boy and his Mom-Mom (his grandmother)
Bottom right: Me and 'Mamer' (aka: *my* grandmother Winnie)


I've said it before. I'll say it again. This boy is an Olympic champ at pasta eating. Is that a competitive game? It should be. And I've got the Gold Medal winner right here.



And why, yes! We did have them come out and sing 'Happy Birthday', Buca style to the young lad. I didn't get a video of that.... but I did get pictures of him enjoying his tasty chocolate cake.




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