Friday, November 30, 2007


Peaceful Religion... yeah, right

Crowd Calls for the Death of Jailed Teacher

It is unbelievable to me that this poor woman was convicted! People want to get up in arms about injustice??? Well, here you go. Get up in arms about this. These people are some of the worst humanity has to offer and they have the gall to say that this woman incited hate and insulted their "prophet." What a crock! All they know it hate.

All because she let her classroom full of kids name their teddy bear, Mohammad.

This is beyond crazy. This is evil.

Thursday, November 29, 2007


Are we doing this right?

By this, I mean life... and all the stuff that gets thrown into the blender. Are we really living? Or are we just following the pattern, like a world full of over-grown lemmings?

I don't know... but I can't help but think that we've missed the boat, somewhere along the way. When is the last time any of us just stopped to ask, "Why?" Why do both of us have to work? Why do my kids need the newest and best? Why is that vacation in the new 'it' place to vacation so darn important? Will I really "just die" if I don't get the latest whatever?

What are we teaching the people around us? Perhaps, that all we care about is ourselves?

I heard it once said that you can identify some one's priorities by how they spend their money. And, I think there's something to that. I've checked myself on more than one occasion by what was written in the subject line of by check book register. We spend our money on that which we love the most. And, I think, more often than not... it's ourselves.

And in the mean time, what are we sacrificing? Who are we sacrificing?

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Leann Rimes - Probably wouldn't be this way

I'm not gonna tell you how to raise your kid, but I've always found that sticking your fingers in your ears and humming loudly solves a whole slew of problems.”

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Croakin' The Toads

I'm sorry, but why haven't we croaked these toads? Seriously? Why is this such a radical thought??? If someone wants to kill you, you kill them first! I do not know why in hell we haven't made a parking lot there! This is frickn' ridiculous!

Suicide Bomb In Iraq Kills 6

Yeah, I Feel Safe...

Good, Lord.... if we can't even have security in the body of officials who are charged with our security and safety....

Double Agent at FBI and CIA

My favorite part? The fact that we paid this chick no small amount of money to bend us over the table.

Why don't we just put out a frickin' big sign at all the borders....

"Welcome to the United States. Spank us. We like it."

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

What seems wrong here???

Why Saudi punished the rape victim

If this isn't barbaric, I don't know what is. Do we really need to be aligning ourselves with a country that treats its' women in such a fashion???

Church Bulletins (Thanks Mom)

Thank God for church stenographers with errant keyboard skills. These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at St. Martin's Church. Please use the large double doors at the side entrance.

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."
The sermon tonight "Searching for Jesus."

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale.
It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house.
Don't forget your husbands.

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.

Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir.
They need all the help they can get.

Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Father Jack's sermons.

The Priest will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing "Break Forth Into Joy."

Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church.
So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?"
Come early and listen to our choir practice.

Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.

Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM -
prayer and medication to follow.

The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind.
They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church.
Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM.
All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.

The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM.
Please use the back door.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

The Priest unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday:
"I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours!"

Stargate Quote of the Week...

JACKSON: You said Hell, right?

O'NEILL: Well, I'm going to end up there sooner or later. Might as well check out the neighborhood, huh?”

Sunday, November 18, 2007

A note to those who comment:

Every once in a while I get a comment from someone who takes issue with something that I have said or posted.

Let me tell you something, I have a really hard time taking someone seriously when they criticize and then don't even have the intestinal fortitude to sign their name. I have no respect for drive-by "shooting" in the blog world. And I have even less respect for people who hide behind "Anonymous" postings.

So, here is what I have to say to the lovely person who tried to police my blog, "Grow up. If you have nothing better to do than to try to pass judgement on me, then you need a hobby... Quick. And if you want to be taken seriously, then sign your damn name & take responsibility for what you say."

Tuesday, November 13, 2007


School is kicking my butt.
Our refrigerator crapped out.
Facebook is highly addictive.

That is all.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Postcard from the edge of "Nanny-dome"

I love being a nanny. I really do. Sometimes, it drives me up the wall. The hardest part, by far, is being helpless when you see your "family" steering into the crazy skid.

As faithful readers of this blog know, my 'family' is currently dealing with some issues with their girls. They have 3 of the smartest, talented and beautiful (inside and out) girls ever to walk this earth. (I might be slightly biased, but not by much.) But there are problems o'plenty. The oldest girl, M, is bulimic and has cutting issues. She's just a few months shy of her 16th birthday now, but I can remember when she was 12 and she would ask things like, "Is this healthy?" "How many calories are in this?" "Will this make me fat?"

The only 12 year old I knew who would ask those things. And I remember telling my mom that she was on the fast track to an eating disorder.

The hardest part of what I do is not being able to help sometimes. I HATE that because I don't have children, my advice is rejected out of hand. If there is one thing in this wide world that will send me so far out of this galaxy that NASA can't track me, is being disregarded. Drives me NUTS!

No, I don't know what it's like to raise a child. But I do know what its like to have to deal with that child when the parent is off doing whatever it is that they do. I do know what its like to have to teach obedience to children who run their households. I do know what its like to teach respect to impudent children. And I do know what its like to teach children about kindness and gratefulness... qualities that are sorely missing from children today.

From this side of the fence these are the most important things parents can teach their children:
Obedience to those in authority
To be appreciative

Trust me on this... life is hell for those of us charged with taking care of your children when they don't know these things. And it shouldn't be up to us to teach them. It should be the most important task of the parents. Because, if you don't get those traits into your children, then what the hell was the point in having them? I mean, really?

And let me tell you, the best time to teach those qualities is when they are still in nappies. Because, when they get completely mobile & good with their vocabulary... game over.

I am over the top done with parents who insist on giving their kids "choices." GRRRR!!!! Little kids (most kids, truth be told) DO NOT NEED CHOICES! They need to know what is required from them & what will happen to them if they don't follow through with their tasks. They need structure and they need clear guidelines.

Kids need to know what to expect. Kids don't do well with life's little surprises. They must learn cause and effect when they are little.

Do kids need time to run and play and be kids? Yes! Of course they do. But the only way they can have that time is when they are allowed to be children, not forced to be little adults. Children need discipline, guidelines, clear expectations... they need parameters. Will they try them? Well, duh. But that's how they learn what behavior is acceptable and what's not. That's how they learn what they can and cannot get away with.

Is this any easy job? Hell, no. This is the hardest job, parenting. (Just ask my mom, I was a hellion. But she did the hard work & I thank her for that.)

If you want something low maintance and easy to take care of, get a turtle. If you are not willing to do the hard work, then you need a kitty... not a child. If you want a friend and companion, get a dog... don't have a child.

Anyway... sorry for the rant. Just needed to get that off my chest.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

I Gotta Agree

Education Is Not the Answer

Thanks Mom

The Little Red Hen
Slightly different story.
Once upon a time, on a farm in Texas, there was a little red hen whoscratched about the barnyard until she uncovered quite a few grains ofwheat.She called all of her neighbors together and said, "If we plant this wheat,we shall have bread to eat. Who will help me plant it?"
"Not I," said the cow.
"Not I," said the duck.
"Not I," said the pig.
"Not I," said the goose.
"Then I will do it by myself," said the little red hen. And so she did. The wheat grew very tall and ripened into golden grain. "Who will help me reap my wheat?" asked the little Red hen.
"Not I," said the blue duck.
"Out of my classification," said the blue pig.
"I'd lose my seniority," said the blue cow.
"I'd lose my unemployment compensation," said the blue goose.
"Then I will do it by myself," said the little red hen, and so she did.At last it came time to bake the bread. "Who will help me bake the bread?" asked the little red hen.
"That would be overtime for me," said the cow.
"I'd lose my welfare benefits," said the duck.
"I'm a dropout and never learned how," said the pig.
"If I'm to be the only helper, that's discrimination," said the goose.
"Then I will do it by myself," said the little red hen. She baked fiveloaves and held them up for all of her neighbors to see. They wanted someand, in fact, demanded a share. But the little red hen said, "No, I shall eat all five loaves."
"Excess profits!" cried the cow.
"Capitalist leech!" screamed the duck.
"I demand equal rights!" yelled the goose.
The pig just grunted in disdain.
And they all painted "Unfair!" picket signs and marched around and around the little red hen, shouting obscenities.Then a government agent came. He said to the little red hen, "You must not be so greedy."
"But I earned the bread," said the little red hen.
"Exactly," said the agent. "That is what makes our free enterprise system so wonderful. Anyone in the barnyard can earn as much as he wants. But underour modern government regulations, the productive workers must divide the fruits of their labor with those who are lazy and idle."
And they all lived happily ever after, including the little red hen, who smiled and clucked, "I am grateful, for now I truly understand."But her neighbors became quite disappointed in her. She never again baked bread because she joined the "party" and got her bread for free.
And all the Democrats smiled. 'Fairness' had been established. Individual initiative had died, but nobody noticed; perhaps no one cared..... as long as there was free bread that "the rich" were paying for.
Small example: Bill Clinton is getting $12 million for his memoirs. Hillary got $8 million for hers. That's $20 million for memories from two people, who for eight years, repeatedly testified, under oath, that they couldn't remember anything.
"IS THIS A GREAT COUNTRY, OR WHAT? " said the Little Red Hen . . .

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Yeah, this is charming.

Note to self... never move to Germany.
Yeah... this sucks.

Iran Justice?

Friday, November 02, 2007

Three Witches from Macbeth
by William Shakespeare

Round about the cauldron go;
In the poison’d entrails throw.
Toad, that under cold stone
Days and nights hast thirty one
Swelter’d venom sleeping got,
Boil thou first i’ the charmed pot.
Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn and cauldron bubble.
Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder’s fork, and blind-worm’s sting,
Lizard’s leg, and howlet’s wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn and cauldron bubble.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Out Loud

I'm just thinking out loud here...

How many of us are actually good about getting outside ourselves? What I mean is, we all know how easy it is to get completely wrapped up in our own particular brand of crazy. So much so that we can't see anything that's in front of us. I read an article in my christian woman's mag yesterday about following through when you say you're going to pray for someone.

... and the thought hit me. A lot of the time I have a hard time just looking up from my junk to see that someone else needs my prayers... much less follow through in a meaningful way.

That kinda caught me off-guard. I mean, I've always thought of myself as a fairly compassionate person & I do make it a policy to never let someone cry in my presence without my arms around them.

I became aware, very startlingly, that every day there are chances to be someone's comfort. To say to them, "I know it hurts. I believe you. I wish I could fix it, but all I can do is hold you and love you." I think, sometimes, that may be the best thing we can do when faced with pain that we can't fix. And that's hard for me to say... I always want to fix it. I always want to make it better... to rescue if I can.

And I realized how many of those chances I have squandered because I was "too busy" to look up.

Anyway. Just wanted to say, look around. There are people who could use a hug. There are people who could use an intercessor.

People who desperately need to be carried to Jesus.

I think that's up there on that list of stuff that makes life worth it.